day 294

It makes me so upset that I have to
 put my dreams on hold
 **


Why is it called
PUTTING ON HOLD
when I am
                   FAR
from even being able to
HOLD onto them.
And sometimes
the reality of being alive
and living
has to get in the way of
pursuing what makes me
happy.

What am I going to do with my life

I can't enjoy a Saturday night
saying what I really want to say
feelin how I really want to feel
Putting all jokes aside
I've been so blank

apathetic

just plain sad
lately

But it's okay.
I'll just hold it all in
keep my blues to myself
 during another 8 hour shift.
 My dreams are dead tonight
tomorrow night
yesterday night
Monday night
Tuesday night



I wish I was born rich and

happy.