1 It's Wednesday early morning. 2:22 AM. Not sure if it's a sign, some sort of coincidence, among the lines of that. I am writing you this letter with hoping ink and comforting words.
2 I met you late Spring. A year ago. We both loved Pokemon, and we both loved each other. You were adventurous, handsome, and geeky. I was broken, and yeah, more broken. And lost.
3 You used to push me away more than pull me towards you. Tell me: What makes this push so much more different? Why did this push pull me towards myself?
4 Why not sooner?
5 It's funny how found I thought I was with you. I was actually more lost than ever. I was not the quiet, polite, sweet girl. I was never boring. And I never plan to be. Today I am, and will forever be, me. In all ways, with regards to all hidden attributes. I am no longer seeking days to be the perfect girl for you. She is out there somewhere, and you will find her. She will not be anything like me, but she will be beautiful in her own way. Hopefully she is found, and hopefully she finds the golden heart in you. If it doesn't work out, ask yourself: Was I last to push? Please do not try to change her.
6 In the unfortunate event that you realize I am finally moving on and seeing someone new: I can't think of any beneficial words for you. Hopefully you can find happiness in your soul to give to me. I don't know if we'll last "forever," if I will lose myself in him, or even if I will fall in love with him. All I know is that I am finally able to stand alone and call myself beautiful. He seeks the same beauty from the world as I do. I don't know where I'll be in 10 years, but I know that I have a passion, and I know that he does, too. We both may have stumbled upon each other's lives to just ignite growth, just like our relationship.
7 You will never be referred to as my "ex-boyfriend." You've gotten under my skin, broken my virginity seals, and sewed me back together. Yes, I was broken a year ago. Yes, I was still lost while with you. Yes, you pieced me together. And I am eternally grateful.
8 You are the only person I have trusted enough to help me overcome my rape.
9 I wish you the best of luck throughout the rest of your journeys. Do not be afraid to live. You've only been existing, and that's worried me.
10 Look at yourself in a different perspective. Stand from afar and look. Ask yourself: what am I doing? WHY? But most importantly, ask who is watching you.
From a past lover
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